Welcome 2013!

The holiday season is officially over and it's now 2013. Hooray! 

2012 was quite the year, to be honest. In both good and bad ways. When it comes to the bad, the focus lies around bad friends, bad people, backstabbing, emotions running rapid and insecurities. All in all, no fun for anyone. As for the good - it outweighs the bad tremendously. I got a wonderful apartment with my wonderful boyfriend, starting our life together and, in the process, writing a whole new chapter in my own life. It was a big step for both parties, and I think it's really influenced personal growth for him and I in a lot of ways. We also adopted a kitten, expanding our wittle family, and thus creating a whole new level of commitment. Nothing says "we're in this" like adopting an animal together. I got a "promotion" and raise at my job, which I've been at for a little over a year. My family, though a few scares did occur, remain healthy, and I have reconnected with some friends from my high school days that constantly prove that they're the right people I need. 

I see 2013 being a big year for me in the "changing" department. I think that I have made some small strides in becoming the person I want to be, and 2013 is the year where that will continue to grow. I've learned a lot about myself and I want to do nothing more than apply those lessons into the new Alexis. All of which leads me to the focus of this blog post: resolutions. Now I know that resolutions are sometimes a waste of time, useless and cliche, but I really think I'm in a place right now to focus on what I want to change, who I want to become and who I ultimately will grow to be. 

Maybe listing those resolutions here will force me, when motivation is low, to continue on my journey of self-improvement. Maybe I'll forgot about them in a few months. Maybe I'll be stubborn and give up. Who knows! For now, I want to write them out so bear with me. 

#1: Let go of the past. This is number one for a reason; it's the most important one to me and my life. I know for a fact that I will not be able to move forward and change without letting go of things that have happened to/with me. Yes, things happened. Yes, some of them sucked. Yes, I've made mistakes. Yes, people have hurt me. But in the end, I need to remember that they happened in the past and should not affect who I am today. That doesn't mean that I should completely forget the things that have happened - let's be serious, that's impossible - it means that I should learn from them, evaluate them and then let go... move on. I want to work on this as best as I can. 

#2: Worry less. I need to stop worrying. I need to stop over-analyzing everything. Worrying is doing nothing for me but making me anxious, moody and wrinkly! I worry about everything from what I look like, to what people are thinking, to what happens if I don't work out for a day, etc. I can't control what people think, so why waste my time and energy worrying about it? In the end, I just really need to take a step back, breathe and move on.

#3: Be nice. This one is a little complicated. I want to really focus on being nicer, more understanding, less angry, and less fighting with my lovely boyfriend. I have very little patience - this is a fact. And sometimes he likes to test that low patience of mine, not meaning to, but still getting the job done. I'd like to slow the anger, slow the annoyance and just.. be nice to him! The same goes for others when my patience is dwindling. Before responding in a snippy way or getting frustrated, I really want to centralize my focus and not get to that point. 

#4: Lighten up on my bod. I have a tremendous amount of self-consciousness with plenty of body issues. What girl doesn't, right? I'm over 6 feet tall, which is abnormal for girls, only adding to the low self-esteem I deal with. My entire life I've been an athlete, which thankfully has left me with a fast metabolism and muscle tone, but after that's all done, there's an empty pit where that competitive athlete used to be. I still work out - every day, for the most part - but my motivation (and for that matter, my body) sometimes slacks. I'll have a panic attack when I don't go to the gym, resulting in a freak out about calories, getting fat and cellulite. Therein lies my resolution: lighten up. If I miss a gym day, it's not the end of the world. I'm not going to instantly gain 50 pounds! My body is in pretty good shape, and I just need to fully recognize and accept that.

#5: Value family and TRUE friends. I have the best mother in the entire world, hands down. No really, I do. My dad and step-mom have their good moments, too. And my grandparents are still alive. NONE of this should be taken for granted. In 2013, I want to spend more time with my family because you never know how much time you actually have with them. They're wonderful people with some awesome experiences, and I want to know them all. Going along with that, I really want to focus my time and energy on positive people that prove that they're true friends I can count on. I don't need to gain approval from people that talk poorly of me behind my back or judge me for absolutely everything. Nor do I want fake people in my life or drama. 

Those are just some of my resolutions. My brain is forgetting any others that I may have considered or thought of. And for now, I think that's a great start. Five things I truly want to work on that I think will make me a better Alexis and put my life in a wonderful place. 

So, here we go 2013! :)