Alternate Universes

Have you ever thought how different your life could be with one tiny decision? Say, a left instead of a right.

Maybe I'm the only one who ponders this - I solely hope not - but I catch myself thinking about it all the time. If I would have done this, what would I be doing? If I would have gone there, where would I be? I know, I know - don't live in the past, focus on the present, fate dictates all, blah, blah, blah - that doesn't stop me from thinking about it.

Like what if I wouldn't have gone to Albion - where would I have gone? who would my friends be? would I have played volleyball? would my career path have been altered? who would I be dating? If I would have gone to GVSU (the school I probably would have ended up at), for example, just WHO would I be? Or what if I didn't break up with so-and-so? Or what if they hadn't broken up with me? What if I would have studied abroad?

My experiences would be totally different, my friends would be different, my love could be different - hell, I could be living in New York for all I know!

It's just an absolutely mind-blowing concept to me and I spend way too much time day-dreaming of the "what ifs" and "what could have beens". At the same time, that's all it is - it's a day dream! I am perfectly content with everything that I've gone through (for the most part...) because it's made me who I am today - and although I have my days - I am pretty happy with who that person is. I have flaws like everyone else and I have my psychotic tendencies, but I've realized mistakes and things I didn't like about myself, and worked to change them.

So for that, thank you Albion, thank you friends from high school, college and my childhood, thank you jackass exes, crushes and enemies, thank you to my mom and thank you to my dad and stepmom, thank you Troy and Birmingham. All through the "what ifs", you were the "what is" and have made me into "who I am."

...and i'm A-OK with that!